Openness

 
   Being an open person is a notable trait, I believe. However, if you're an open person you should be open about everything, including the fact that you demand more of yourself. Therefore, in the same breath that you tell someone "I did wrong, and I'm not ashamed to speak about it", you should also be able to say "I hope not to do this again". If living a moral life means aspiring to higher standards, that should be a part of your openness.

   It seems to me that open people can be put into several categories:

   1) Someone who will be totally open about himself, but is not aspiring to become better. Such a person can be viewed as using openness as a way to make it easier for him to do what he wants; he doesn't have to hide it. I'd venture to say that this type of openness is a reflection of today's carefree society, where doing what you want is the norm. This should not be the case in Judaism; our religion tells us there is more to life than our desires.

   2) Someone who will be totally open about himself, but is not using his openness as an excuse; he still expects more of himself. This is an inspirational type of openness; speaking with such a person will leave you with the impression that "He's in the same boat as me", "If he can do it, so can I". Such a person realizes that he must aspire in order to achieve, and exudes this inspiration to others.

   3) This is the not-open person. Although he may be working on himself, he isn't open about it. This leaves others with a sour taste in their mouths, e.g. "He's really the same as me, he's just too proud to admit it", etc. Needless to say, this type of person doesn't inspire others .

   Looking at these three categories it's easy to conclude that the ideal form of openness is the the second one we have discussed. Such a person is living for real, and at the same time is able to speak about his shortcomings to everybody who is ready for serious conversation. This is the form of openness that I believe in the long run will inspire and astonish other not-so-open people.

   So do what's right and good luck.